Life doesn’t always go according to plan, and when a crisis hits—whether it’s homelessness, a...
Family crises, like homelessness, can stir up a whirlwind of emotions in both children and adults. These intense feelings—fear, anxiety, sadness, even anger—can be overwhelming, especially when it feels like everything is unraveling. But in these moments, it’s crucial to remember that while the situation may be difficult, there are ways to help both ourselves and our children navigate these big emotions with care and compassion.
Recognizing and Addressing Our Own Emotions
Before we can effectively support our children, we must first recognize and address our own emotions. As adults, we often feel the pressure to stay strong, to hold everything together for the sake of our families. However, ignoring our feelings doesn’t make them go away; in fact, it can make things worse.
Start by acknowledging what you’re feeling. Are you scared, overwhelmed, or perhaps even resentful? Whatever the emotion, give yourself permission to feel it. This doesn’t mean dwelling in negativity but rather recognizing that your feelings are valid and that it’s okay to have them.
Once you’ve acknowledged your emotions, find healthy ways to express and process them. This might involve talking with a trusted friend or counselor, journaling your thoughts, or simply taking a few moments each day to breathe and center yourself. Remember, taking care of your emotional well-being is not selfish; it’s essential. When you are more in tune with your feelings, you’re better equipped to support your children through their emotional challenges.
Practical Strategy #1: Modeling Emotional Expression
Children learn a great deal about managing emotions by watching the adults around them. When you express your emotions in a healthy, constructive way, you’re teaching your child to do the same. For example, if you’re feeling anxious about an uncertain future, you might say, "I’m feeling a bit anxious today because things are uncertain. But I know we can get through this together." This not only normalizes emotional expression but also reassures your child that it’s okay to feel and talk about their emotions.
Helping Children Navigate Their Big Emotions
Children often struggle to understand and articulate their emotions during a crisis. They may act out, withdraw, or display signs of anxiety that they don’t yet have the words to explain. As parents and caregivers, our role is to help them identify and navigate these big feelings in a way that promotes emotional growth and resilience.
Practical Strategy #2: Creating a Safe Space for Feelings
One of the most important things you can do is create a safe space for your child to express their emotions. This doesn’t have to be a physical space, though that can help; it’s more about fostering an environment where your child feels secure enough to share their feelings without fear of judgment or punishment.
Encourage your child to talk about what they’re feeling, even if they don’t have the right words. You can help by naming emotions for them: "It seems like you’re feeling really sad right now. Do you want to talk about it?" Let them know that it’s okay to feel whatever they’re feeling, and that you’re there to support them no matter what.
Practical Strategy #3: Using Routine as a Comfort
During times of crisis, routines can provide a sense of stability and normalcy for children. While it may be challenging to maintain a strict routine in a situation like homelessness, even small, consistent practices can make a difference. This could be something as simple as reading a book together before bed, having a regular check-in time to talk about the day, or setting aside a few minutes each morning for quiet reflection or prayer.
These routines serve as anchors in the midst of chaos, giving children something predictable to rely on. It’s also a chance for you to check in with yourself and your child emotionally, reinforcing that sense of safety and connection.
Caring for Yourself While Caring for Your Child
Supporting a child through a family crisis is a heavy burden, and it’s easy to forget about your own needs in the process. But to be there for your child, you need to take care of yourself, too.
Practical Strategy #4: Setting Boundaries and Asking for Help
Recognize that you don’t have to do everything on your own. It’s okay to ask for help, whether it’s reaching out to a community support group, seeking assistance from social services, or simply asking a friend to lend an ear. Setting boundaries is also crucial. Give yourself permission to say no when you need to, and prioritize your own mental health. This might mean taking a few minutes each day to step away from the situation, to breathe deeply, meditate, or engage in a simple self-care activity that brings you peace.
Practical Strategy #5: Mindful Presence
When we’re overwhelmed, it’s easy to become distracted, to lose ourselves in worries about the future or regrets about the past. But in these moments, try to focus on the present. Be mindful of where you are and what you’re doing. When you’re with your child, be fully there with them—listening, engaging, and connecting. This not only helps your child feel supported but also allows you to be more attuned to your own needs and emotions.
Moving Forward Together
Family crises like homelessness are incredibly difficult, but they don’t have to define your family’s story. By recognizing and addressing your own emotions, creating a safe space for your child to express theirs, and finding small moments of routine and connection, you can help your family navigate through these challenges with resilience and hope.
Remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and it’s okay to take care of yourself. By doing so, you’re not just surviving the crisis; you’re modeling strength and emotional intelligence for your child, teaching them that even in the hardest times, it’s possible to move forward with compassion, courage, and love.
